Fun sex tip: when you orgasm, lose your soul turn into a ruthless murderer and torture and kill all her friends and family like the centuries old vampire you are
What are you so afraid of!?
I’m REALLY sorry but it looks like they’re about to rap battle
That’s exactly what I thought, too
Epic Rap Battles of DISNEYYYYYYYYYYYY
Hey nice hair
Ms. Curly ass fro
You’re out of control
Mine is slick like the snow
Your right it’s petty to just
focus on your look
Should we focus on talent
'cause we know you can't cook
Go ahead and threaten me with your
little wooden weapon
But not even a bear cankeep me from steppin’
Up on your turf ‘cause I’m
straight rippin’ from Narnia
And if you walk out the door now
I promise no harm to ye’.
coming from a from a Frozen ass bitch
I don’t even need my bow
to deal with this sitch’
I didn’t realise you started rapping
'cause I thought we kept it classy
With the noises coming out your mouth
I thought it was your sister being gassy!
You’ll destroy yourself
by keepin’ everything inside
Your powers can’t be controlled ‘cause
your sick in the mind!
Both parents are dead!
Now you’re ill in the head -
If I didn’t know better I’d say you hated red -
Hair! Cause you changed your sis
Didn’t notice till now but your fate is this
To be upstaged by we the new dominate race
I guess people like us better b/c gingers are running this place.
Don’t pop your top
you unreasonable scot
If you weren’t so selfish then you’d’ve not
turned your mom to a bear
how the hell is that fair?
At least when I try and change people
I only change their hair!
If you say you can go change your fate
But I know the only reason you say you can
Is cause you suck at choosing a date!
Don’t bring up dates to me, ai’ght
'Cause your sister knocked down two me in two nights!
And yet there you are up in your castle aloneHope you don’t get frostbite sweetie just from sitting on your throne!
Once you look inside yourself you’ll realise your a sham
Not an actual royal specimen like I am.
And now you understand I’ve just kicked your ass, so
take my solemn advice dear.
And let it go.
Can I be Sally?? PLEASE OMFG
the deadmau5 photo tho ha ha ha
Recently, your mother and I were searching for an answer on Google. Halfway through entering the question, Google returned a list of the most popular searches in the world. Perched at the top of the list was “How to keep him interested.”
It startled me. I scanned several of the countless articles about how to be sexy and sexual, when to bring him a beer versus a sandwich, and the ways to make him feel smart and superior.
And I got angry.
Little One, it is not, has never been, and never will be your job to “keep him interested.”
Little One, your only task is to know deeply in your soul—in that unshakeable place that isn’t rattled by rejection and loss and ego—that you are worthy of interest. (If you can remember that everyone else is worthy of interest also, the battle of your life will be mostly won. But that is a letter for another day.)
If you can trust your worth in this way, you will be attractive in the most important sense of the word: you will attract a boy who is both capable of interest and who wants to spend his one life investing all of his interest in you.
Little One, I want to tell you about the boy who doesn’t need to be kept interested, because he knows you are interesting:
I don’t care if he puts his elbows on the dinner table—as long as he puts his eyes on the way your nose scrunches when you smile. And then can’t stop looking.
I don’t care if he can’t play a bit of golf with me—as long as he can play with the children you give him and revel in all the glorious and frustrating ways they are just like you.
I don’t care if he doesn’t follow his wallet—as long as he follows his heart and it always leads him back to you.
I don’t care if he is strong—as long as he gives you the space to exercise the strength that is in your heart.
I couldn’t care less how he votes—as long as he wakes up every morning and daily elects you to a place of honor in your home and a place of reverence in his heart.
I don’t care about the color of his skin—as long as he paints the canvas of your lives with brushstrokes of patience, and sacrifice, and vulnerability, and tenderness.
I don’t care if he was raised in this religion or that religion or no religion—as long as he was raised to value the sacred and to know every moment of life, and every moment of life with you, is deeply sacred.
In the end, Little One, if you stumble across a man like that and he and I have nothing else in common, we will have the most important thing in common:
Because in the end, Little One, the only thing you should have to do to “keep him interested” is to be you.
Your eternally interested guy,
Happy International Women’s Day
Why the hell couldn’t I have had a dad like this!?
Since my other picture of me in my kilt in the snow got a couple of notes, have the whole chopping logs adventure.
All Dean has ever wanted is the one thing he just can’t have: a family of his own. And while so many things have stood in his way, it boils down to the fact that he believes people would be better off without him. It’s not hard to see why. When Dean is caught stealing, John can’t even be bothered to come pick him up, he’d rather have him “rot in jail.” So yeah, of course Dean thinks he doesn’t matter, can’t see his own worth. But just look! Dean, can’t you see how perfect you are for this job? He always knows just what to say, because he remembers when he was young. Remembers the things he wished John would say, on days when he wanted nothing more than for his father to look him in the eye. But he can’t fold, can’t indulge, because he’s afraid of what he has the potential to become. Please Dean, can’t you see? That’s not you. You’re a better man than your daddy ever was, Dean Winchester.
And Dean always squats down when he’s talking to kids, gets on their level. It takes the whole “adults looking down on you” dynamic away and just leaves a grown man bringing himself down to look them straight in the eyes. Because he remembers what it felt like to be looked down on, in many ways still knows what it feels like to be looked down on, whether he’s actually being looked down on or just imagining it. Because Dean Winchester has never felt worthy of anything or anybody. That’s why he always makes excuses for John and for Sam and for Cas. Why he always runs back to them. Why he’ll never stop defending them. Because no matter what they do, it can’t be as bad as how he thinks of himself.
WHAT MADE YOU THINK THIS WAS OKAY
THIS JUST MADE ME EMOTIONAL